Survival
by Tollwutgefahr
Summary: Jack, Shepard, and Grunt defeat a thresher maw, but Shepard isn't so exuberant; Jack investigates. Colonist Sole Survivor femShep/Jack. Rating is for Jack's fairly pervasive strong language.


They'd killed a fucking thresher maw. Just the three of them, _on foot_. That was a high. All the fucking krogan wanted to kiss their feet, or at least Grunt's and Shepard's. Jack was just glad she'd gotten to be there for it. Now _that_ was a good fight.

She watched Shepard on the ride back to the Normandy. Something was wrong about the way she held herself. There was something _Not Shepard_ about it, and when they stood to get off the shuttle, she noticed a slight tremble in the Commander's hands. The fuck was going on with Shepard?

Back on the Normandy, Jack started digging around, searching the extra net for anything that might explain the mission seeming to shake up the unshakeable Shepard.

_[**Search:** shepard thresher maw]_

_Shit_. Akuze, 2177. Whole fucking lot of dead marines and only one left to tell about it. That was Shepard. Jack knew Shepard was some kind of Alliance badass or whatever, but damn. That wasn't just one thresher maw, either. More digging led to more information about the attack, and another thresher maw attack on Edolus. More dead marines. That time, Shepard blew the thing up in a M35 Mako.

And fucking Cerberus did that. How the fuck could Shepard work for them, knowing that? Fuck.

Jack heard the thud of boots on the stairs leading to her bunk. Shepard. No one else bothered to come down, but Jack knew Shepard's step anyway.

"Jack?"

"Why the fuck do you work for Cerberus? They fucking used you and other marines to fucking study Goddamn _thresher maws_. They nearly killed you, Shepard." Jack caught a change in her own voice. The way she says they nearly got Shepard fucking killed. And she knew why. Because she'd been thinking that fucking Cerberus almost kept Shepard from being alive to break her out of Purgatory. Not ever meeting Shepard...the idea bothered Jack more than she wanted to think about.

Shepard leaned against the wall by Jack's bed, arms crossed over her chest. "It's not because I want to, Jack. Cerberus...they're the only people who'll let me have the resources to do what I need to do. To keep the galaxy safe. The Alliance doesn't give a shit about me anymore, Jack. Not past using me as a figurehead. Or a scapegoat, depending on how they're feeling."

It's weird, seeing Shepard look...vulnerable. It made Jack uncomfortable. Shepard being tough or a hard-ass she could deal with. It kind of hurt, and not in a fun way, either.

"Look, Shepard-"

Shepard held up a hand. "I just wanted to see how you were doing, Jack. I...didn't really keep an out of you, or Grunt, once the...once the thresher maw popped up."

Jack remembered watching Shepard during that fight. It was like nothing existed except Shepard and that fucking thing. She'd never seen Shepard be that _quiet_ during a fight before. That explained it, though.

She shrugged. "You wanted to stay alive. I get that, Shepard. I do."

Shepard pushed off from the wall and paced for a moment, pausing with her back to Jack. "I shouldn't have let my memories get in the way like that. If something had happened to you because of my selfish need to survive-"

"Don't you get all fucking mushy on me," Jack growled, jumping to her feet. "I can take care of myself."

"But what if you couldn't, Jack?" Shepard turned to face her. "Everyone slips up, sometime. Everyone. You're on my team. I'm not leaving anyone behind this time." Something in her eyes softened, just for a moment, and Jack's heart jumped unexpectedly. "Especially not you..."

Shepard reached out like she was going to touch Jack's face. Jack stiffened slightly and Shepard dropped her hand; she looked like someone had just fucking kicked her puppy. _Fuck it_. Jack grabbed the front of Shepard's uniform and kissed her, hard. Shepard kissed back, hands settling on gripping the fabric at Jack's waist after some hesitation. Commander not knowing where to put her hands. Cute.

Jack pulled back from the kiss, hand still clenched in Shepard's uniform. "We get done saving the galaxy, we steal this fucking ship and fuck Cerberus up with it, okay?"

Shepard laughed, and Jack couldn't stop herself from smiling. "I'll think about it."

"You fucking better."


End file.
